How Will Our First Child Cope When the Twins Arrive?

My name is Holli and together with my husband Tom we have three children.  Poppy who is four, or “almost five” as she would say, and twins, Rory and Alexis who are 22 months.  We had Poppy when I was 22 and Tom was 21, she was a beautiful blessing and being the first grandchild on both sides of the family she was showered with love and attention.

Tom and I had planned on having another child while Poppy was still young as we loved the thought of Poppy getting to grow up with a sibling.  I knew I was pregnant pretty much straight away, but I couldn’t understand why I was so horribly sick,  I had it all worked out in my head that this baby must be a boy, because I wasn’t sick with Poppy at all.

I had my first ultrasound at 12 weeks, I was worried I wouldn’t be able to lie on the bed for it as I was so ill, and being filled to the brim with water didn’t help.  The lady poked around for a good 15 minutes before she said “There are two heartbeats, you’re having twins”, Tom and I couldn’t stop giggling. It’s weird being in such a quiet room with a stranger, finding out news that is going to completely change your life.  I wasn’t sure how to react, we were both so excited and wanted to run out of there and tell our families.

My pregnancy felt like it went on forever. I was huge and in the last month had trouble with every task, sleeping, eating, going to the toilet, even sitting in a chair was painful and made me feel ill.   

We were concerned about the impact it would have on Poppy bringing two newborns into the home when she had been the focus of all our attention for so long.  We showed her photos of when she was a baby, and explained to her about how much time it took to look after her, we took her shopping for new items for the twins, and let her pick out things she liked or toys she might like to share with the new babies.  When the twins were born she spent the day with her Granny and when she came to visit us there was a present there from the new babies for Poppy. She of course was smitten with them straight away and took it all in her stride.

Our twins were very small when born and had to stay in the NCIU at the hospital for a long time before they were big enough to be able to bring them home. Driving home from the hospital for the first time, and pulling up to an empty house, alone, was horrible, I sat in the car and cried, not wanting to go into the house without my babies.

Since the day we bought our babies home, it has seemed like they have been here forever. Tom worked interstate for months at a time and I was lucky to have our family close as I don’t think I could have gotten through it without them.  Every task is a well planned mission, taking food, changes of clothes and toys everywhere we go. Lugging the huge double pram about makes me think how easy life use to be when I could just throw Poppy on my hip and run to the shop for some milk.

Rory and Alexis are such different little people, who are coming into their own: Rory being a quiet little boy who loves cuddles from his Grannies and me, and Alexis who is very strong willed and likes to keep me on my toes. They have a very special bond which isn’t surprising as they have spent every day since they were born (and the nine months before) together, eating, sleeping, bathing and playing together.

We feel so blessed to get to experience having a multiple birth and can’t imagine life any other way.

 

Holli Roberts - 2013

Tasmania








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